Don McMinn

For the past 14 years, I’ve led groups of friends on annual trips to destinations around the world. We’ve explored Paris, London, Western Europe, Russia, Peru, the Mediterranean, Baltic States, Greek Isles, British Isles, and North Africa. We’ve never had a malfunction or bad experience — just memorable, life-enhancing experiences.

On our 2025 trip, we’ll explore the “Last Frontier” — Alaska. We’ll see steep forest mountain slopes, pristine waters, calving glaciers, and Native American settlements. Wildlife sightings will include whales, seals, sea otters, eagles, bears, and mountain goats (bring your binoculars)!

Mary and I have been to Alaska 10 times and enjoy it more each time we go. This trip will be a once-in-a-lifetime experience. There are so many things to like about this trip:

• • Most cruises to Alaska are 7-days; ours is 11-days.
  • We’ll sail aboard the stunning 5-star Queen Victoria; one of four ships owned by the iconic Cunard Cruise Line.
  • We’ll sail the famous Inside Passage, visiting Glacier Bay and Tracy Arm.
  • August is the ideal time for travel; coastal temperatures average 50-60° F with 18 hours of daylight.
  • Most cruises to Alaska do not include shore excursions; ours does.
  • We’ll have a full day to explore Seattle.
  • The flight from DFW to Seattle is only four hours.
  • The itinerary includes a stop in beautiful Victoria, British Columbia, Canada.

It’s been said that one of the joys of traveling is not only where you go but who you go with and who you meet along the way. This boutique trip will be limited to 50 individuals who travel well and enjoy exploring great places.

There’s a reason we call our trips Travel with Friends. We want to create an experience in which lifelong friendships can be established and nurtured.

Travel takes time and money, but it’s worth the investment. You’ll be stretched and challenged, and you’ll learn more about the world in which we live and the life you live in the world.

I hope you’ll join us on this memorable trip. See below for brochure.

Don and Mary

Click here for information brochure.

There are times when I am so unlike myself that I might be taken for someone else of an entirely opposite character. Jean-Jacques Rousseau, Confessions, 1782

Recently, Mary and I hosted our neighborhood’s monthly dinner party. From 7:00 to 11:00 p.m. our home was filled to capacity with people.

I struggle at these events because I am the archetypal introvert. My idea of a good evening is to sequester myself in my study and read a book. I would rather chew on cut glass than have to be “on” for four hours at a social event.

But last night I played the part. I was a gregarious, talkative, engaging host.

Was I being disingenuous and hypocritical? I don’t think so, because sometimes we need to act like someone we’re not. Psychologists have a term for this: counter-dispositional behavior.

I learned this lesson from psychology professor Brian Little’s book titled Me, Myself, and Us: The Personality and the Art of Well-Being. Little teaches a large, popular psychology course at Harvard. Though he is an introvert, his teaching style is very animated and energetic, so much so that his students are always surprised to hear him admit that when he’s teaching, he’s also acting. Little explains and defends his behavior in chapter three of his book: Free Traits: On Acting Out of Character.

I’m a big proponent of authenticity; we all need to discover how we are unique, accept the distinctions, and live authentically. Be your true self because therein lies deep satisfaction. Long term, you cannot sustain inauthentic behavior. But in the short term you can, and sometimes should, fake it.

Dr. Little says there are two main reasons why counter-dispositional behavior is often necessary — for professional reasons and for love.

If certain aspects of your work require you to be someone you’re not, have the emotional fortitude to play the part. For instance, if you’re a salesperson you may need to be more animated than your real self would normally be. Likewise, if for the love of family and friends you need to put aside your true self and temporarily assume a new persona, do so.

Last night I was an extroverted host. I did it because I love my neighbors and wanted them to feel welcomed and affirmed during their brief stay in our home. I couldn’t maintain that image 24/7, but I did for 247 minutes. Granted, it was exhausting, and when the last guest left, I went to my study, pulled out a book, and resumed my normal identity.

Former United States senator Daniel Moynihan famously said, “You are entitled to your own opinion. But you are not entitled to your own facts.”

He was distinguishing between subjective opinions and objective facts. Though everyone is free to form their own opinions, facts are universal truths that cannot be altered or ignored based on personal beliefs or preferences.

We should be lovers of facts—things that are known or proven to be true; a truth known by actual experience or observation; something that can be proven to be true or false through objective evidence.

Some people seem to be allergic to them. 

First, identify facts. With the rampant and intentional spread of disinformation and misinformation, it’s often challenging just to know fact from fiction. Some facts are indisputable: π will always be 3.14159; World War 2 happened. Other facts are harder to confirm.

Then there’s the challenge of interpreting facts. Sometimes even very smart people can come to different conclusions though they’re considering the same facts. For instance, some Noble-prize winning economists recommend austerity as the cure for a weak economy, other Noble-prize winning economist recommend stimulus. 

Often facts are presented out of context, or we’re told part of the truth but not all if it. We often cherry-pick our information, accepting only that which confirms our bias.

It’s challenging, isn’t it. Let’s just try the best we can to value and pursue facts. They are our friend. 

“Since the days of antiquity, those sitting in judgment of the gravest crimes have required evidence of a man’s intent and sought to classify his awareness of the moral implications of his actions. Even when one man kills another, we separate the accidental from the spontaneous and the spontaneous from the carefully planned—despite the fact that such distinctions provide no comfort to the dead.” (Amor Towles, Table for Two)

This topic is very complicated but extremely important. I’ve wrestled with it for months. I’ve written my current thoughts at the end of this post. 

Intentions reveal the underlying reasons behind a person’s actions, providing insight into their true motivations and character. But whereas actions leave evidence, intentions are often silent and hard to verify. People often lie about their intentions, which creates an extra layer of ambiguity.

Ethically, the intent behind an action is often seen as a primary factor in judging its morality. While intentions are crucial, the consequences of an action still have real-world impact, and sometimes the negative outcomes of an action can’t be dismissed even if the intention was good. There’s even a difference between a well-intentioned action that results in a negative outcome and a malicious action that has a positive outcome.

Here’s where I’ve landed on this topic.

When someone offends me, I should consider their intentions.

For my own peace of mind and to be generous toward others, unless a bad intent is obvious, I should assume that people are acting with good intentions.

Recently, I got frustrated when someone wasted my time and money. I was quite stirred up until I considered intent. I realized she had not intentionally done what she did; there was no malice; she had just made a mistake. That thought helped me settle down. 

When I offend someone else, I shouldn’t use intent as an excuse.

If I do something that hurts another person I should focus on my action and the outcome, not my intent. When I commit an offense I should not rely upon an innocent intent to ameliorate the incident. For instance, if I accidentally back my car into yours, I needn’t say, “But I didn’t mean to.” Regardless of my intent, your car is damaged and I should apologize and take responsibility to fix it. 

If I regularly offend people, though I think my intentions are pure, I need to analyze my actions and adjust my behavior. Self-awareness combined with a humble and contrite attitude will motivate me to change and do better.  

Intentions are the reasons behind what you do. Actions are the things that you actually do. Results are what happens as a result of actions. We are responsible for all three.