Don McMinn

September 29, 2026September 12, 2026

We all need help getting through a dark period of life

“In everyone’s life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.” Albert Schweitzer

Please reread what Schweitzer wrote. It is significant.

I memorized his thought about 25 years ago. It meant a lot to me then. It means even more to me now because I’ve experienced both sides of the equation—one whose inner fire has gone out and one who helps another person whose fire has been extinguished.

There was a time when my inner fire went out. For about six months in my mid-forties, I became clinically depressed. I thought my life was over. I was bewildered and hopeless. My wife and two daughters helped me through the darkness. Antidepressants helped a lot.

For the past five years, I’ve helped a friend whose “inner fire” went out. Over the course of about 10 years his life slowly but inexorably ground to a stop. He became hopelessly adrift. Unemployed, bankrupt, destitute, undiagnosed mental illness, legal problems, and finally homeless.

In my heart I made a commitment to come alongside him and help. It’s been the most difficult thing I’ve ever done. At times I’ve wanted to give up, as has he.

But now his “inner spirit has been rekindled.” He still has a long way to go, but he’s on track and every day is a step in the right direction. My friend has been incredibly courageous and determined in his recovery. Few people have overcome so many major and persistent obstacles as he has.

I think my part in assisting his comeback will be one of the finest and proudest endeavors of my life.

At some point in your life, your inner fire will go out. Pray that someone will be there to help you.

At one or several times in your life, you’ll be compelled to help someone else whose fire has been extinguished. You can’t commit to help everyone who is needful, but you can do it once or twice in your life.

Granted, it usually takes a “village” to help someone get out of a deep pit, but one person needs to lead the effort. One person must say, “I’m going to take hold of my friend and not let go.”

September 22, 2026August 22, 2026

Two good ways to develop empathy: engage with people with special needs and read great novels.

Empathy and sympathy are valuable life skills.

They are important to our own mental and emotional health, and they are essential to developing deep, meaningful relationships with other people.

For the first 40 years of my life, I didn’t really understand what these words meant—or, more importantly, how to practice them. I’m still learning.

Empathy and sympathy are related, but they are different.

Sympathy is feeling concern for another person because of what they are experiencing. Someone tells you, “I lost my job today,” and you respond, “I’m so sorry. That must be really difficult.”

Empathy takes us a step further. It means entering, as best we can, into another person’s experience and feeling something of what they are feeling: “I’m so sorry. I can imagine how painful and frightening this must be. I hurt because you’re hurting.”

I’ve written about these ideas in previous posts. Here, I want to focus on two practical ways we can develop empathy:spending time with people who have special needs and their families, and reading good novels.

Spend time with people who have special needs

Being involved with people who have special needs—and with their families—reminds us of a fundamental truth: every human being is created in the image of God (Imago Dei). That means every person has inherent dignity, value, and purpose.

As we get to know these individuals—not simply as “people with special needs,” but as friends—we begin to see their unique personalities, hopes, joys, frustrations, and struggles. We become more aware of the challenges they and their families face every day.

And as we enter their world, even in a small way, empathy begins to grow.

Read good novels

Good novels can do something remarkable: they allow us to enter the lives of people who are very different from us.

In one novel, we may follow a character, a family, or a group of friends for years—even generations—experiencing their moments of joy, love, disappointment, grief, and despair. We watch their lives unfold and begin to understand why they think and feel the way they do.

The fact that the story is fictional doesn’t diminish its value. We can still identify with the characters because, beneath our differences, human beings share many of the same fundamental emotions and longings.

But not all novels are equally helpful for developing empathy. Look for books that emphasize character development and the inner lives of the people in the story. Many action novels, detective stories, and science-fiction books I’ve read are entertaining, but they didn’t necessarily take me deeply into the emotional lives of their characters.

If you want to experiment with my premise, I recommend The Covenant of Water by Abraham Verghese.

It’s a big gulp—715 pages, or about 31 hours in the audiobook—but it delivers.

While reading it, I often wept. Sometimes I would simply close the book and think about what I had just experienced.

It was a wonderful investment of time. I thoroughly enjoyed the book, but more importantly, it helped me become a better person.

It fine-tuned my sense of empathy.

And perhaps that’s one of the great gifts of a good novel: for a few hundred pages, it invites us to leave our own little world and enter someone else’s.

If we do that often enough, we may become better at doing the same thing in real life.

September 16, 2026September 16, 2026

Stonebriar Community Church to host Music Kiev concert

Friends,

I want to invite you to a very special concert at Stonebriar Community Church.

On Saturday evening, October 10, at 6:00 p.m., we will host a two-hour concert featuring Music Mission Kiev, a professional choir and orchestra from the capital of Ukraine.

For the past 33 years, this ensemble has shared the gospel of Christ within their country, and this fall they begin their 14th tour of the United States. Although wartime restrictions prevent the men of the ensemble from traveling, the women of the Kyiv Symphony Orchestra and Chorus (KSOC) will bring artistry, courage, and faith to American audiences through a blend of sacred classical and beloved Ukrainian folk music.

These concerts share messages of hope and raise support for war widows, orphans, and displaced persons in Ukraine.

Tickets are $10 and are available online at:

https://www.stonebriar.org/events/event-details/?id=65829

It will be a stirring and memorable evening.

Don

September 15, 2026August 22, 2026

Avoid lopsided conversations

I’m continually befuddled and frustrated by one-sided conversations.

- - I recently sat next to a person on a three-hour flight. I asked him about his career and family and he responded in detail. He never asked about mine.
  - Mary and I had dinner with another couple. We initiated conversation about their world; they never asked about ours.

It seems to me that the focus of casual conversations should normally be evenly divided among participants. If there are four people present, each one should have about 25% of the time. Granted, if I had dinner with a famous person whom I admire, I might want the conversation to revolve around her; but otherwise, conversations should be distributed.

If you’re the victim of a lopsided conversation, take the initiative to direct the conversation. For instance, when in the midst of a one-sided-leaning conversation, sometimes I’ll pursue balance by answering the same questions I’ve asked. If I ask someone “tell me about your children,” I’ll then volunteer information about mine, even if it’s not requested. But it’s sad that I must do this.

If you’re the perpetuator of lopsided conversations, think about what’s driving the inequality and address the fundamental problem; it’s probably one of the “self” words: self-centeredness, self-reverence, selfishness. The solution to this social and relational faux pas is found is Philippians 2: “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.” We should focus on others instead of ourselves.

We may be so self-absorbed that we truly aren’t interested in others, and that’s why we talk about ourselves exclusively. In which case we should discipline ourselves to behave right (ask about others) so that eventually our behavior will help us think right, that is, we’ll truly want to be interested in other people’s lives and want to prefer them. Every person has a story worth telling that we can benefit from hearing.

Let’s balance our conversations.