Don McMinn

Emotional contagion is a term coined by behavioral scientists for a fairly universal aspect of human nature—that we tend to mirror the mood signals of others. We tend to mimic verbal, physiological and behavioral aspects of another person’s emotional experience and thus experience the same emotion. When someone smiles at us, we are likely to smile in response, which in turn makes us feel more positively about them and our circumstances in general. Laughter will tend to prompt laughter, anger will prompt anger, and tears will prompt tears. Emotions can be “caught” – transmitted from one person to many.  

Emotional contagion is an important trait. It’s what allows a parent to comfort a child so effectively. It allows us to immediately adjust our demeanor when we come into contact with others.

Marketing and PR companies have long utilized emotional contagion by associating positive images dan feelings with certain brands. Commercials are filled with smiling actors doing fun things even though what they’re doing has little relationship to the product being promoted. Some critics deride this as “emotional engineering or emotional manipulation” but it obviously works to sell products.

Use emotional contagion to positively empathize with and affect others. Also, be aware of how you may be manipulated by it— buying that new car may not bring the happiness, prestige, or contentment suggested by the advertisements promoting the car.

Here’s a video of my family riding in a van from London to Southampton. Everyone was in a somber mood because of the rainy weather. I decided to brighten up the ambience using emotional contagion. We laughed till our sides ached.

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I recently strolled down the aisles of our local Whole Foods grocery store. I couldn’t help but notice that they offer twelve types of apples. Twelve. Likewise, the menu at Starbucks is extreme. Choosing a 401(k) plan is complicated. Deciding on a cable provider and the level of programming can take an inordinate amount of time. There are just too many choices. 

American psychologist Barry Schwartz advises against offering so many choices.

In his book, The Paradox of Choice: Why More Is Less, Schwartz argues that sometimes, offering fewer choices is better than offering many. A large selection can lead to paralysis and indecision. 

For instance, eliminating consumer choices can greatly reduce anxiety for shoppers. 

To test this theory, a supermarket set up a stand where customers could sample 24 varieties of jelly. They could try as many as they liked and then buy them at a discount. The next day, the owners carried out the same experiment with only six flavors. They sold ten times more jelly on day two. The first day, the wide range of choices was overwhelming to customers so they bought less.

Because modern Americans value autonomy, self-determination, and freedom of choice, we assume that more choices mean better options and greater satisfaction. But apparently, there is a level at which too many choices is counterproductive.

Choice overload can make you question your decisions before you even make them, it can set you up for unrealistically high expectations, and it can make you blame yourself if you choose unwisely. In the long run, too many options can lead to decision-making paralysis, anxiety, discontentment, and may cause us to confuse the unimportant with the important.  

The key is balance: Offer people choices but not too many. And when making personal choices, consider fewer and simpler options, and don’t belabor making decisions.

Problem: We often know what to do, but we don’t do it.
Solution: Err toward action, and measure results.

Knowing what to do is not enough; we must do. In some cases, the gap between knowing and doing is more inhibiting than the gap between ignorance and knowing. Competitive advantage comes from being able to do something others can’t or don’t do.

To avoid the knowing-doing gap, realize that:

1. 1. Talking is not a substitute for action. Talking about something is not the equivalent of actually doing it. Rhetoric is often an essential first step, but eventually something has to get done and someone has to do it.
      Beware of people who:
      • Talk too much. Sometimes there is an inverse relationship between how much a person talks and his ability to get things done.
      • Use “smart language” or technical jargon. Complex language and ambiguous terminology confuses people and inhibits action. People who resort to this may be hiding behind incompetence.
      • Are critical. Some people try to sound smart by criticizing other people’s ideas.
   2. Making decisions is not a substitute for action. By itself, a decision changes nothing.
   3. Preparing documents is not a substitute for action.
   4. Planning is not a substitute for action.
   5. Just because something is easy to understand doesn’t mean it will be easy to implement.

How to close the gap

1. 1. When possible, learn by doing; “If you do it, then you will know it.”
      When you learn by doing, there is no knowing-doing gap. Knowledge that is actually implemented is much more likely to be acquired from learning by doing than from learning by reading, listening, or even thinking. Surgeons follow a three-step process of learning their trade: “hear one, see one, do one.”
   2. Always err toward action. This creates opportunities for learning by doing. It helps to establish a cultural tone that action is valued and that talk and analysis without action are unacceptable. Use rapid prototyping to see if things work and then modify them on the basis of that experience.
   3. Fear can foster knowing-doing gaps. Setbacks and mistakes should be seen as an inevitable, even desirable, part of being action oriented. Action-oriented people make mistakes so provide a “soft landing.” “Learning is an extension of the word trying.” Nanus and Bennis
   4. Measure results, not actions. “The foundation of any successfully run business is a strategy everyone understands coupled with a few key measures that are routinely tracked” (Dean Tjosvold). Often, measuring many things is counterproductive; measuring more things will not necessarily get more of the right things done; but do measure important metrics. Don’t measure activity; measure results.
   5. As a leader, adopt an apprenticeship approach to managing your team members; be a coach, not just a teacher or mentor. Unfortunately, knowing by doing is, initially, a less cost-effective way of transmitting knowledge and changing behavior (it is counterintuitive to much of our Internet-driven culture), but ultimately, it is the best way.

For the past 14 years, I’ve led groups of friends on annual trips to destinations around the world. We’ve explored Paris, London, Western Europe, Russia, Peru, the Mediterranean, Baltic States, Greek Isles, British Isles, and North Africa. We’ve never had a malfunction or bad experience — just memorable, life-enhancing experiences.

On our 2025 trip, we’ll explore the “Last Frontier” — Alaska. We’ll see steep forest mountain slopes, pristine waters, calving glaciers, and Native American settlements. Wildlife sightings will include whales, seals, sea otters, eagles, bears, and mountain goats (bring your binoculars)!

Mary and I have been to Alaska 10 times and enjoy it more each time we go. This trip will be a once-in-a-lifetime experience. There are so many things to like about this trip:

• • Most cruises to Alaska are 7-days; ours is 11-days.
  • We’ll sail aboard the stunning 5-star Queen Victoria; one of four ships owned by the iconic Cunard Cruise Line.
  • We’ll sail the famous Inside Passage, visiting Glacier Bay and Tracy Arm.
  • August is the ideal time for travel; coastal temperatures average 50-60° F with 18 hours of daylight.
  • Most cruises to Alaska do not include shore excursions; ours does.
  • We’ll have a full day to explore Seattle.
  • The flight from DFW to Seattle is only four hours.
  • The itinerary includes a stop in beautiful Victoria, British Columbia, Canada.

It’s been said that one of the joys of traveling is not only where you go but who you go with and who you meet along the way. This boutique trip will be limited to 50 individuals who travel well and enjoy exploring great places.

There’s a reason we call our trips Travel with Friends. We want to create an experience in which lifelong friendships can be established and nurtured.

Travel takes time and money, but it’s worth the investment. You’ll be stretched and challenged, and you’ll learn more about the world in which we live and the life you live in the world.

I hope you’ll join us on this memorable trip. See below for brochure.

Don and Mary

Click here for information brochure.