I’ve learned a new phrase that comes in handy when I’m inordinately or unnecessarily worried about a mistake I made. I learned it from my friend Jason.
One day we were talking about a mistake that happened in one of our worship services (we started a song in two different keys). I was obsessing about it when Jason said, “Don, don’t worry about it; no one died.”
If an air-traffic controller, surgeon, or pilot makes a mistake, someone can die. But most of us work in jobs where mistakes are not fatal or permanent. Embarrassing perhaps, but not life-altering.
I’m not, of course, suggesting that we be flippant about making mistakes; we should always be careful and do our best. But sometimes we need to give ourselves and others grace. Sometimes it’s okay just to admit that a mistake was made, analyze why it happened so it won’t be repeated, and then drop the issue and carry on.
When you flub up, are you too hard on yourself? Or too easy? Are you too hard on other people when they make a mistake, or do you extend grace?
Inevitably, errors happen, so put them in proper perspective.
Two video series I highly recommend
Most nights, Mary and I end the day watching video shows together. It’s relaxing and enjoyable. We recently finished two shows on Netflix that we totally enjoyed: S.W.A.T (about the Los Angeles police team), and All the Light We Cannot See (the book by Anthony Door won the Pulitzer Prize and is now a four-part video series.) The story takes place in WW2. The protagonist is a 12 year old girl who is blind. Watch and enjoy.
Book – How To Know A Person — the Art of Seeing Others Deeply and Being Deeply Seen by David Brooks. This book is actually my favorite book of the decade. I’ve bought copies for all my direct reports; in 2024 we’ll process the book together one chapter a week.
Travel Moment – On the last day of the Travel with Friends trip to the British Isles, we visited the Beaches of Normandy where the D-Day invasion commenced. It is a quiet, reflective place that includes 9,387 graves where U.S. soldiers are buried. Suddenly, two Mirage fighter jets flew over the cemetery at low altitude and tipped their wings. The sound was deafening; it literally shook the earth. I wept. My son-in-law, who was a flight surgeon on an F-16 squadron, once tried to describe to me the thunderous sound of fighter jets in flight, but I did not understand, until that moment on Omaha Beach.
Wine – In this annual “best of” list I usually share the name of the best wine I had during the year. But this time I’ll share a good suggestion on how to buy wine.
friends I have on earth – members of the Stonebriar Community Church music ministry. I love the staff and each musician who serves. Here’s a picture of our 2023 Christmas concert.
Concert – In September I was with 48 friends in London at St Martin-in-the-Fields church near Trafalgar Square. The evening candlelight concert featured music by Bach and Handle performed by a 15-voice choir and strings. I heard sounds I had never heard before. The packed sanctuary of around 400 people were transported to another time and place. 
Fun experience – In March, Mary and I had the privilege of leading worship on Chuck and Cynthia Swindoll’s trip to Israel. It was our sixth time to travel to Israel with Insight for Living. Chuck is one of the greatest men I have ever known. 
Family event – In October, my daughter Sarah gave birth to Claire Elise. Claire spent the first three weeks of her life in the NICU and then came home a healthy, robust baby. She has infused our household with a new sense of joy and excitement. She affirms my long-held belief that grandchildren are God’s reward for not having killed your own.